Jul
21
2003
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F E Rogers, NZRN, BA 1946 - 2003 |
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Written by Blair Rogers
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Monday, 21 July 2003 |
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Frances was many things to many people. She was a wife and mother, daughter and sister, aunt, cousin and gran, but most of all she was a friend to all those who knew her.
 F E Rogers 1946-2003
The earliest re-collection that I have of her sense of participation was while at Westshore Primary School in the late 1970’s where Frances served on the school’s PTA. From there she seemed to have always been involved and busy with a number of local and national organizations.
It was also in the late 1970’s, that my elder half brother Kent came to live with us at our family home. Kent has told me that he is forever indebted to Frances for what she did in allowing him to stay in her home, when it was what he most needed at that point in his life. Not in fact, as I was lead to believe for many years, that he needed a little brother that he could tie up after school to power poles.
Frances was actively involved in the Hawkes Bay branch of the New Zealand Nurses Organisation during the 1980’s while she was working in the Napier Operating Theatres, studying extramurally for her Nursing degree, running the household as well as undertaking the most important role of raising her children and being the wife to Bill.
I still have no idea how she managed to do all that and still stay sane!
In the last 15 or so years whilst all her children – and I use that term very loosely - have flown the coop, and plenty of 747 Jumbo Jets as we have spread around the globe and in my case back again, Frances’ focus has changed as she scaled back her involvement in Committees and trying to solve every other person’s problems and instead started to address her own interests.
I noticed this trend occurring with increasingly beautiful and fantastic floral creations that adorned the house when I visited home in the University Holidays, and the Garden was ever changing and expanding.
Overtime as Frances gained experience it became an almost all consuming passion, and when we went for a walk together, her eagle eye would be scouting out some new foliage that she could use to construct her floral art.
I suspect that her quest for foliage and its forms was a key factor in her taking so readily to tramping.
I actually took Mum on her first tramping trip. We tried to undertake the Lake Waikaremoana track with my Auntie Geraldine.
Lets just say that one third of the way up Panekiri Bluff and with myself loaded down with 2 full packs – things were not looking good. After another half hours struggle, we all decided that it was not going to do me any good carrying three packs up the Bluff, and we retired from that endeavour.
A few years after this, and Mum a lot more tramping fit, she completed the Lake Track with Auntie Geraldine. I was very proud of her.
In 1996, Mum’s first grandson was born - Nicholas – the child of my half brother Tony and his wife Annie. Well to us children this seemed to be what she had been waiting for – Grandchildren!
She soon set up an almost cottage industry churning out home crafted gifts for her grand-children. Frances completed large ABC wall hangings, made Xmas stockings, put together fantastic New Zealand scrapbooks for the Grandies 3rd birthdays, knitted jerseys, made clothes, cushions and generally just provided all sorts of amazing New Zealand gifts and books.
Of course until the birth of my son Flint in 2002, the somewhat sad thing for Frances was that all her Grandies were living overseas. In London, she has Sydony, Nicholas, Christopher and Andrew, in South Milwaukee she has Rebecca and Dean and in Sydney she has Joel and Caitlin.
The effort that Frances put into her grand-children was her way of staying close and in touch with them, and letting them know that she loved them and each one was special to her.
Certainly when Frances and Bill were able to visit, the Grandies would all be most excited at the prospect of Gran and Papa visiting them, and would invariably drag out the items that she had sent them.
I know without any doubt whatsoever that Tony and Anne in London, Kent and Sharon in Sydney, Christine and Derek in South Milwaukee, Karyn and Stuart in London, and Pam and I will treasure the time and effort that she put into her Grandies.
When she was first in hospital with the stroke, she said to the doctor that she just wanted to get back out tramping, but this was not to be.
It was 4 wks to the day since Frances was diagnosed that she passed away. While it gave us all time to say goodbye, it did not give us much time.
The news spread fast, and in jetted her family from around the world. We had some amazing times, some sad times, plenty of laughs, lots of honesty, and a huge amount of respect for the way in which Frances carried herself with dignity over her final weeks.
It was a privilege to be at her bedside with Bill, Karyn, Sydony and ‘Buntie’, at Cranford Hospice in Hastings as she passed away.
The family would like to pay special tribute to the staff of the Hawkes Bay Regional Hospital and the Cranford Hospice for the care that they so professionally gave to Frances.
Over the next few weeks, months and years, many things will trigger memories of Frances for us. Even during her last weeks she was trying to complete quilted cushion covers for all the grand-children. Unfortunately she was unable to do this and Karyn is currently completing them and she feels that Frances is very close to her while she works on them.
These will be very special keepsakes for all the Grandies and their families. For me especially, whenever I am in the bush or on top of a hill, she will be with me. And whenever I am in the garden or see some beautifully arranged flowers, I will remember her.
Poem about Life by Mother Theresa of Calcutta that Frances read at Blair Rogers and Pam Carter's wedding and recited back to her at her funeral.
Life is an opportunity, benefit from it
Life is beauty, admire it
Life is bliss, taste it
Life is a dream, realise it
Life is a duty, complete it
Life is a game, play it
Life is costly, care for it
Life is will, keep it
Life is love, enjoy it
Life is a mystery, know it
Life is a promise, fulfil it
Life is sorrow, overcome it
Life is a song, sing it
Life is a struggle, accept it
Life is a tragedy, confront it
Life is an adventure, fear it
Life is luck, make it
Life is too precious, do not destroy it
Life is life, fight for it.
Eulogy from her son - Blair Rogers |
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Last Updated ( Tuesday, 07 November 2006 )
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